Blindfolds, cuffs, spreader bars and spanking – can it all make those bad thoughts go away? 

While sex is generally touted as being wonderful for our physical health, the pleasures of BDSM are rarely exalted as a pathway to 'strapping' mental health. But, in our experience, we've found the opposite is true. Some kinky practices not only stimulate our relationships, but have the ability to quiet the mind, bring us back into our bodies, even help us process the emotions buried well beneath our dauntless exteriors. So, what's the deal: can BDSM support your wellbeing?

Enjoy a spanking? You must be crazy!

Historically, psychologists labelled sexual sadism and sexual masochism as a pathological. Unfortunately, these outdated labels stuck and implied that the BDSM community were mentally impaired in some way. Ironically, it’s the establishment’s labelling of BDSM practises as a 'paraphilia' that has damaged the emotional wellbeing of many of us kinky cats.

Role reversal and research.

Thankfully, more recent studies on the psychological profile of BDSM practitioners found that, “S&M practitioners are healthier and less neurotic than those with a tamer sex life.” The study also revealed that kinksters tended to have lower levels of depression, anxiety and PTSD, were more open to new experiences, more conscientious and self-disciplined. This isn’t to say that kinksters don’t have mental illnesses, just that BDSM may be useful in managing these conditions and facilitating meaningful emotional release.

So, how can BDSM improve your mental health, you ask?

Superficially, distraction is a common technique that’s used to reduce panic, anxiety and stress, and what could be more distracting than some all-consuming, consensual kinky sex? On a deeper level, this kind of play can help deactivate large areas of the prefrontal cortex to quieten busy brains and let our bodies do the talking. 

Ready to add a little kink to your mental health regimen? 

Please note: This blog is written to entertain and prompt kinky curiosity. If you have a history of trauma or pain sensitivity, we recommend you consult a BDSM professional to see what BDSM pathways are best for you to embark on first.

Here are some ways we're soothing the symptoms:

FEELING ANXIOUS?

  1. Have your butt whipped and sexual pleasure withheld until you beg for mercy.
  2. Be blindfolded and gagged while receiving oral sex. No moaning allowed.
  3. Have your wrists and ankles tied to the bed, so you’re spreadeagled and mercilessly pleasured with a feather, pinwheel, vibrator, tongue...
  4. Use some over-the-door cuffs, nipple clamps and a leg spreader. As above.
  5. Wear a sex toy while running errands and have your lover take control, remotely. "I need that eggplant"!

FEELING DEPRESSED?

Other BDSM practices (err, spanking anyone?) can help alleviate depressive symptoms by inducing an altered state of consciousness. For example, after a scene, a submissive may slip into an alternate state called the 'sub space'. This can activate something called, 'transient hypofrontality' or what many call a 'flow state', accompanied by a floaty feeling, peacefulness, time distortion and even a reduction in pain.

A dominant may go to a 'top space' or 'flow' during and after a scene, where there is a high associated with focused attention as well as a calmness that follows. These altered states and feelings of release may be the reason that those who experience anxiety or depression may feel better or calmer after a scene.

Of course, there's no substitute for therapy.

By all means, use kink to soothe your anxious mind, clear your thoughts or allow you to relax and have fun, but please seek professional medical advice if you need to. Or hey, why not practice both? A little kink, a little cognitive behavioural therapy, all the better for that beautiful brain of yours.

Fortunately, the stigma associated with kink (and therapy!) is waning so we can all enjoy its benefits without the fear of being labelled 'sick'. (Or maybe that was the lure?)

We'll leave you with a little recommendation: some exercise, a healthy diet, and some casual flogging.